his head was hollowed and his brain
on scales–was this a trick to prove
fore-knowledge after death?
-Wole Soyinka
It’s been nearly a year since a devastating loss I faced. His name was Max. He was a dear friend of mine, and I still think of him very regularly.
I wouldn’t say we grew up together, but we did spend time together throughout our lives. In high school, though, he changed mine, which has left an impact on me. He died when we were both only eighteen, and now I made it to nineteen. He would have six weeks before I did.
After he died I suffered. Following that, my life changed drastically. Now, a year later, I faced another loss, but it parted me quickly and left me joyful. Like losing a diseased limb, not that she was bad, but that the loss tore out a piece of me, but a piece that was not functioning with the rest of my body. She didn’t die, though. I left her, or she left me. It happened one way or another.
Now I have another loss I’m facing, which comes in forty-four hours. This loss I knew about longer than Max, but not as long as her. This loss is a temporary loss, and one which will bring healing. Not my healing, as with the limb; his healing, as he goes home to allow his mind to relocate itself.
Mend.
God has been good to me, even though things are difficult. He has rewarded me for the weeks I spent close to him, by granting me consolation of the recent loss of her and the upcoming loss of him.
But tears are still flowing, not as I write this, but daily at other times.
Loss reoccurs throughout life.
States of Praise 